More tales from the call centre

Customer quote of the day "You're a Dickhead, mate !"

I love the way Aussis speak. In England we'd just call someone a dickhead and be done with it, but out here they like to call everyone mate even when there insulting you.

One of the girls from the day shif was talking to me in the break and apparently The night shift are referred to at the Ferrals. This is the Aussie equivalent of a Scally, i.e the scum of the earth. What the hell did we do to deserve that except have much better time at work due to our much more relaxed take on the working day.

She was also telling me about the guy she had just managed to kick out of her house. He was a friend of her boyfriends who originally asked to stay for 2 nights while he sorted out his new place. He stayed over a year and refused to leave. He also refused to cook or clean or show any respect towards his hosts.

Guitar sessions starting at 2am were common, so was getting drunk and bringing home 18 year old girls to shag (he was 39). She threatened to shange the locks and leave his stuff out side once,a dna he threatedn to call the police if she did 'something about moving his stuff wiothjout permission'. Finally her boyfriend had to put his friend down to get him out. It happened soon after the soap holder incident.

Someone broke the soap holder in the shower and she asked if it was him. He said yes. She asked how it had happened and he said 'I was sitting on the floor of the shower having a wank and when I finished I stood up too quick and hit the soap holder with my head and it broke off'.